


Gold Anniversary

by Riddlebird-puff (hobbitpuff)



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Birthday Fluff, Growing Old Together, M/M, Old Men In Love, Treasure Hunt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-12 21:03:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16879146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobbitpuff/pseuds/Riddlebird-puff
Summary: It is Oswald’s 50th Birthday and Ed surprises him with a game.





	Gold Anniversary

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheFlirtMeister](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFlirtMeister/gifts).



> My gift is for: theflirtmeister  
> Ship: Nygmobblepot  
> Wish: Old Men in Love

“Wakey, wakey, birthday boy.”

Oswald groaned against the sudden sunlight flooding his bedchamber and pulled the covers over his head. “Go away,” he mumbled. It was much too early to deal with the Riddler.

“Riddle me this, what goes up everyday but never comes down?”

“Your ego?” Oswald pulled the blanket down. “My weight?”

“Like fine wine or cheese, the answer is age, Penguin,” the Riddler placed the breakfast tray on the nightstand. “And today marks your gold decade.”

“The Stone Age, more like,” he sat up keeping the blankets over his stomach, self conscious even though the Riddler knew every inch of this old body. “How did you get in?”

“You know me, I'm able to slip through any area,” the Riddler posed, he was wearing the ridiculous rhinestone bodysuit he had worn at the Wayne Masquerade Ball ten, no fifteen years ago. Of course it would still fit him like a glove, at least he wasn't wearing the horrible red wig too. “I can never remember,” he tapped his cane against the bed. “Is it kisses or spanks for a birthday?”

“It isn't technically my birthday until-.”

“Seven and thirty-three,” the Riddler supplied.

“How… do you know that?” Oswald did not believe he had ever told him the exact hour of his birth.

“I have my ways,” he giggled. “I know everything about you, Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot.”

Oswald wasn't sure if he should feel flattered or threatened, with the Riddler it was always hard to tell.

“What are you doing here, Riddler?” Oswald would like to think the rogue had simply broken into the Lounge to wish him a Happy Birthday but that was hardly the Riddler's style.

“I propose a game,” he grinned. “A birthday game. You will find the first clue there,” he pointed to the breakfast tray with his cane.

“Don't you think I'm a little too old for playing games, Riddler?” Oswald hated games almost as much as he hated birthdays.

“Nonsense, you are but half a century young, Oswald,” the Riddler took his hand and kissed the back of it. “And I promise to make the second half as fun as the first has been.”

The Riddler may have failed to kill him the first half of his century but he would surely finish the job, one way or another, before the second half was done.

“But first I must leave,” he placed the silver and green rhinestone mask over his face. “Come and find your birthday gift. And don't forget to eat your breakfast, Ozzie dear.” He tipped his bowler at him.

Oswald watched the Riddler leave through the door, and if his eyes drifted down the rogue would never know. He remembered the fun they had together the night of the Wayne Masquerade Ball and afterwards at the Lounge. The bodysuit was truly a crime against fashion but the Riddler knew how to make crime look good.

The Riddler closed the door behind him, Oswald did not bother calling security. The Iceberg Security was accustomed to the Riddler coming and going any hours of the day, and night. And they had strict orders to not interfere. The relationship between the Penguin and Riddler was the second worst secret of Gotham, the first of course being the identity of the Batman.

Oswald looked at the tray the Riddler had left for him. The rogue had given him plenty of reasons to not trust him and even less reasons to trust him, but their rivalry had mellowed with age. The last time the Riddler had acted against him… well, they had promised each other never to speak of it again. Things had been good between them, almost too good. He pulled the tray over his lap.

The first thing he noticed on the silver tray was the small origami _paper_ penguin, much like the original he had kept all these years. On the side was a _cotton_ napkin with a _leather_ ring wrapped around its middle. There was a bowl of _fruit,_ grapefruit and melons, and a vase holding lilac _flowers._ A _wooden_ box lay beside a small plate of mint _candy._ Oswald picked up the box and flipped the spring top, inside lay a simple key. A folded piece of paper fell out, he unfolded it and read the message written inside.

‘Meet me at the beginning of memory, at the hour of labor - ?’

* * *

‘I can bring tears to your eyes and resurrect the dead.

I form in an instant and last a lifetime.

What am I?’

 ‘A memory.’

 

Oswald stood before the simple door, the key held in his hand. He had not been back here since he left twenty something years before, though he had often returned in memory. Surely someone else lived here in this apartment now. If he were wrong the GCPD would be called and he did not care to spend his birthday with the good Commissioner Gordon. He took out his pocket watch and looked down.

4:34 p.m. The hour of labor… his mother had gone into labor before her last shift had finished, she had worked until the last moment. Fifty years ago on this day. It was strange to think he was older than his mother now. He wondered what she would think of the man he had become, he feared she would be less than proud. He had waited long enough. He put the key in the lock, he was not surprised that it fit, and turned the doorknob. He opened the door.

There was a man in a royal blue suit with his back to the door.

“I'm sorry, I must have the wrong apartment.” He thought he must have gotten the riddle wrong after all but then the man turned around. “Riddler?” It was Riddler but he looked different, more like the man he had been, if more silver in the hair.

“Call me Ed here, Oswald,” he frowned. “You're early.”

“Your riddle said the hour of labor,” he shrugged. “My mother had gone into labor after four-thirty, during the early bird hour.” His mother had been working as a waitress at a diner frequented by the senior community.

“Yes, your mother was admitted to Gotham General at 5:21 p.m. on July 26 fifty years ago today,” Ed said.

“How… did you kidnap the nurse on duty that night and torture her for that information?”

“Don't be morbid, I only had to break into the hospital's records archives and steal the admittance book for the year and month of your birth.” Ed pulled out a chair at the table. “Take a seat while I heat up dinner.”

Oswald did not know what to make of this. The apartment was just as he remembered it, as though he had slipped backwards through time. He sat down at the table, the same table if he was not mistaken.

“Here, it isn't the same robe, that was unfortunately lost after Gotham fell, but as I'm sure you'll remember the apartment still has a chilly draft,” he handed Oswald a _wool_ robe. “And I know how much you dislike the cold.”

Oswald decided to play along, for now, and slipped the robe on. “I'm actually surprised you kept this old place.”

“I didn't,” he said on the way to the kitchen area. “I purchased the entire building two years ago and everything else had been in GCPD storage.”

“Why, though? I thought you wanted to burn everything that belonged to the former Ed Nygma.”

“Sentiment,” he came back holding a tray. “Weren't you for a moment happy here?”

“Why would I have been happy,” Oswald said. “I had been shot and abducted by a strange kidnapper with a nice ass.”

“I knew you peeked,” he winked. “Don't worry, I did too.”

Oswald cleared his throat. “Should I be checking around for a Leonard?”

“No Leonard I'm afraid, but I thought we might have some tea before dinner,” he placed the tray down on the table and put out the _pottery_ green tea set. Ed opened the tea _tin_ and dunked the tea bags in the hot water. “Martin sends his regards from Shanghai. He wanted to come for your birthday but couldn't get away from the firm, he promises to make it for-, well, he'll text you later tonight and tell you himself. This tea set is his gift to you on this day.”

“No doubt he will come home to Gotham for my funeral,” Oswald took the tea cup from him. His only son couldn't even be bothered enough to send his own father a birthday gift, he had gone through Ed instead.

“Martin is a grown man, married with children, and his own responsibilities, Shanghai _is_ his home now,” Ed reminded him. “Let me get your other gifts, the Sirens also sent their regards.” He came back with the items.

“This is from Selina,” he handed Oswald a cane topped with a _steel_ emperor penguin. “This is from Ivy,” next he handed a _silk_ tie with small umbrellas. “And lastly, this comes from Kean,” he handed a embroidered handkerchief edged in _lace_ , initialized in cursive with O.C.C.

Oswald inspected the gifts, they were each exquisitely crafted, but then the Sirens always did have exquisite taste.

“I have keys but no locks, I have _ivory_ but I have no tusks, what am I?”

Keys… _ivory._ _Ivory_ keys. “Piano, the answer is piano.”

“Correct-o,” Ed walked to the piano and played with the keys, a simple melody that Oswald should have recognized. “It was sadly damaged by the fools at GCPD, but I had it refurbished and tuned, and it's as good as new.”

‘Just like a wandering sparrow, one lonely soul, I walked the straight and narrow, to reach my goal, God's gift sent from above, a real unselfish love, I found in my mother's eyes,’ he sang softly as he played.

The song was one his mother used to play on the piano for him when he was a boy, he could almost hear her voice. He had forgotten what she sounded like, what her eyes looked like. But with the song he could almost but not quite remember. He wiped his eye with the handkerchief.

“Why are you doing this, Ed? Have you not hurt me enough in the past?”

“I… thought you would enjoy a stroll through memory lane, so to speak,” he stopped playing. “I didn't think… dinner should be ready, I'll set the table.” He jumped up and went to the kitchen area.

Oswald felt guilty, Nygma had obviously tried to make his fiftieth birthday special. And he had ruined it.

Ed came back carrying two _crystal_ wine glasses and a bottle of expensive wine. He opened the bottle and poured the wine into the glasses. He then placed two plates made of fine _China_ with penguins and umbrellas painted along the rim. He placed _silverware_ beside each plate, the handles were question marks.

“The _China_ and _silverware_ is from Gordon and Lee,” he went back for the pan with dinner. “The takeout restaurant did not survive the fall of Gotham, but the owner managed to escape to Bludhaven, and I was able to get the recipe from him. I added my own improvements to the recipe.” He served their plates. “And left out the onions.”

“A toast,” Ed held up his glass. “To wine, whisky, cigars, and wisdom, and things grow finer with age.”

“Revenge, vengeance, and retribution,” Oswald held his own glass up. “And love, and things that grow colder with time.”

“May my love for you never grow cold,” Ed clinked his glass. “Although, I cannot say the same for the dinner.”

Oswald took a drink, hoping Ed would not notice the blush in his cheeks or if he did he would blame the wine. In twenty years, or so, together it was not the first time Nygma had declared he loved him. But most declarations of love occurred in the heat of the moment, in bed or behind Gotham alleyways while running from the GCPD and the Batman. Though, Oswald feared his running days were behind him and he was afraid Ed would finally start to lose interest in him.

Nygma was a young man still in his forties who had kept himself in shape and looked to be still in his thirties. Some men wore their age well, like Nygma, Oswald was not one of those men. He had heard the rumors, the whispers behind his back, the Riddler could have anyone he wanted. Why would he want a fat, crippled, old Penguin like himself?

After dinner had been cleared Ed checked the clock.

“I almost forgot the cake!” Ed jumped up and ran to the kitchen area again, coming back carrying a round layered cake with enough lit candles to start a fire alarm. He set the cake before Oswald. “Stand and make your wish, Oswald.”

Oswald wiped his mouth and got to his feet. “I already know my birthday wish, I believe you still owe me a birthday kiss.”

“You know, if you tell your wish, it won't come true,” Ed leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “Now make your wish.”

“Why don't we just skip to the part where I unwrap my gift and we finally break in that old mattress of yours?” Oswald asked.

“You still have one more clue to go before you get your gift,” Ed answered. “Blow out the candles, Oswald.”

He rolled his eyes, bent over the cake. He wished for.. twenty more years with this ridiculous man at his side, to grow old, older, together. He closed his eyes and blew out the candles, and every light in the apartment went out leaving him in near complete darkness.

When the lights came back on, he was alone and on the table was a black _pearl_ in a _coral._ There was a note:

‘Meet me at the time of birth, at the place of rebirth.’

* * *

The docks was the last place he wanted to spend his birthday, but of course the Riddler's game would lead them here. For good or bad, mostly bad, this seemed like their place. This was where Ed had nearly ripped out his heart and he couldn't help but wonder if he had lured him here to make another attempt, he would not survive a second attempt if that was the case.

Oswald looked down and picked the item sparkling up at him. It was a _ruby_ and blue _sapphire_ brooch, the exact replica of an artifact that had recently gone missing at the Gotham Natural Museum. He sighed, he should've known the Riddler had been involved in the theft.

“You came,” the Riddler came up from behind him, once again dressed in a finely tailored three-piece green suit and black dress shirt. “You have found the last clue.”

“If you had meant to gift me hot goods for my birthday, you could have saved me the trouble and called the GCPD with a tip on where to find the stolen gems.” Everyone knew the Penguin did not deal in hot merchandise, which meant everyone knew he could help get rid of it, for a price.

“The Dragon Eye Brooch is not your birthday gift, Oswald,” Ed took something out of his coat pocket, for a brief moment he was afraid it would be another gun. “This is,” he held up a small box. “But first you must answer a riddle.”

“I thought you said this was the last clue.”

“It was, the last clue to the riddle,” he stepped forward. “It has no ending or beginning, it binds the contract from rebirth to death, it is a promise to those who say yes.”

“Ed?” Oswald knew another sort of fear, hope.

“Please, answer the riddle, Oswald,” Ed played with the box in his hands. “You must answer the riddle first.”

“The answer is…,” he was afraid to be wrong. “Ring, the answer is ring.” He was afraid he was right.

“I knew you would get it, Oswald,” Ed got down on his knee and opened the small box. “Will you marry me, Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot?” Inside the box was a simple, but expensive, gold ring.

“I… and everyone knows about this… your game, they were all in on it?” he started piecing together the pieces.

“Yes,” he nodded. “I asked Martin first and he helped in the plans.”

“And the strange treasure hunt? The gifts? We're they all part of the game?” Was that all this was to the Riddler, a game?

“The gifts were representative of the Traditional Gifts for Anniversaries. First year being paper, Second cotton, all the way through Fiftieth year being gold,” he explained. “Sixtieth is diamond but I didn't want to risk waiting ten more years to ask you to marry me." 

“I… accept your terms, Nygma,” Oswald answered. He let Ed place the ring on his finger.

This was the best birthday in fifty years of birthdays.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Full list of gifts (each was italicized in the fic)
> 
> Here is the list:  
> 1\. Paper  
> 2\. Cotton  
> 3\. Leather  
> 4\. Fruits and Flowers  
> 5\. Wood  
> 6\. Candy  
> 7\. Wool  
> 9\. Pottery  
> 10.Tin/Aluminum  
> 11\. Steel  
> 12\. Silk  
> 13\. Lace  
> 14\. Ivory  
> 15\. Crystal  
> 20\. China  
> 25\. Silver  
> 30\. Pearl  
> 35\. Coral  
> 40\. Ruby  
> 45\. Sapphire  
> 50\. Gold
> 
> Anyway (sigh) hope you like it. :)
> 
> PS When you mentioned liking the Burton movies I couldn't resist putting Riddler in 'the suit'.


End file.
